The Ease Of Being In Flow

October 30, 2023

by Wendy Betterini

Have you ever experienced moments when everything seemed to just flow? Moments when you didn’t have to struggle or fight or force things to happen? It’s as if there were a giant hand holding a magic wand a few paces ahead of you at every step, magically shifting circumstances so that everything goes your way.

As a writer, I’m keenly aware of “the flow.” It usually means the difference between my words spilling smoothly and effortlessly onto the page, or each word being wrung stiltedly and painfully from my resistant mind.

The flow seems to happen spontaneously most of the time. We might be working, running errands, doing chores around the house, or even just kicking back and watching television. Whatever we’re doing, we realize that we feel good. Calm, relaxed, alert, happy - we are in a state of non-resistance. We’re not struggling with errant emotions or frustrated desires. We simply feel in tune with the rhythm of life.

Not only do we feel better, but our experiences seem to be easier, smoother, more enjoyable. People we encounter seem kinder, we end up getting the good parking spaces at shopping malls, money comes to us more easily, our relationships seem more harmonious, and so on.

Though we’ve probably all experienced this buoyant state of being at one time or another, most of us don’t experience it enough. On a regular basis, we deal with setbacks, irritations, frustrations, disruptions, interruptions, and moments of pure exasperation. Worse, once we are “out of flow,” it seems incredibly difficult (if not impossible) to get back into the flow.

Well, I’m here to tell you that not only is it possible, it’s quite simple once you understand the steps that will bring you back to a harmonious state. Lately I’ve been exploring these steps in more detail, and I’d like to share some tips to help you get (and stay) in the flow in your own life.

Understand the source - before we move on to the tips, it’s important to understand that this “flow” comes from WITHIN YOU. It’s not some distant essence that you have to locate and draw from. There are no magic words to recite, and you don’t have to rely on anyone else to make your life more harmonious. On the flip side, just like you are responsible for the times when you’re in flow, you also need to take responsibility for the times when you’re out of flow. Most of us tend to blame our outer circumstances for our lack of balance and peace. While they can certainly encourage us to feel a certain way (frustrated, angry, impatient, etc.), they cannot control our emotions unless we choose to let them. And the source of “flow” — IS our emotions! That’s a crucial point to understand. Feeling in flow, or feeling out of flow, is an indication of whether our emotions are in alignment, or not.

Let go - once you understand that you are the creator of the flow in your life, the first step (and probably the most difficult) is to simply LET GO. Let go of your resistance to certain circumstances, your attachment to specific outcomes in your daily experiences, and your desire to control everything that happens in your life. This is challenging to say the least, especially if you’re in the midst of unpleasant circumstances. Still, just for the moment, stop fighting, stop struggling, stop resisting, and just focus on accepting.

Open up - whenever you can, imagine expanding your mind and opening your awareness to your surroundings. Tune in to what you feel and allow yourself to become immersed in the sensations. Don’t judge them or try to change them, just experience them. Allow them. Be present in whatever situation you find yourself in. Rather than focusing on the way you want things to be, stay with the way things are right now. Be okay with whatever you’re experiencing, instead of trying to swim against the current.

Be joyful - find something positive about your current circumstances and focus on it. Tune in to the better aspects of where you are, and be grateful for them. You can use a gratitude journal to record these things in written form, or just concentrate on them mentally and take a few minutes to appreciate them.

Choose to flow - okay, here’s where it gets fun! Rather than focusing on the ways you’re NOT in the flow at any moment - choose to GET into the flow. Say aloud, “I am totally in the FLOW right now.” Or when you begin to experience challenges, say to yourself, “Okay, I’m going with the flow, I’m not going to resist, I will simply go with the flow.” And then do just that. Don’t let yourself get frustrated or stressed, simply repeat the letting go step above, and consciously CHOOSE to go with the flow. Imagine that you are a leaf or a twig being carried along on a swiftly moving stream. Relax your muscles, breathe deeply, and simply allow yourself to be carried along. Even better, choose to enjoy the ride. :-)

Like any new technique, this can take time and practice before you experience the full benefits. But the good news is that the more you focus on it and the more you work on staying in the flow, the easier it will get! Before long, it will seem like an automatic process and every day will seem to hold a spontaneous element of flow, no matter where you go and what you do.
About the Author

Wendy Betterini is a freelance writer specializing in self-improvement and personal development concepts. Visit her website, for free articles on positive thinking, goal-setting, self-esteem, personal growth, and more.

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One Response to “The Ease Of Being In Flow”

  1. Matt on July 8th, 2008 12:58 am

    Wendy, mastering flow is one of lifes challanges that if properly done can transform every aspect of ones being but I bet you already know that. I have gone through some life expreriences that taught and are teaching me to be in the moment and stop borrowing trouble from tomorrow. I have found that if we stop borrowing trouble there will almost be no moments of trouble. Further, I would venture a guess that if we stop borrowing trouble from another time that our minds will be focused on non-trouble and by the law of attraction it will be eliminated. You are saying the same thing by admonishing us to stay in flow. That is the state of not borrowing trouble. Flow is the easy part, our resistance to it is what is hard to let go of. Envision yourself letting go of the resistance and it will get easier each time.

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